October 18, 2007

And the sem ends

though there is one more exam left tomorrow and i am still in page 107 of 207 of the reviewer with less than 24 hours to go.

I got accepted at the Sanggumay Residence Hall, and next sem i'll be a real 'dormer'. So i'll see how i fare in trying to poo where others can hear that slight plop or that shameless fart.

Oh, and how i'll pack! I've got too much stuff and i don't know where to put them. I'm thinking of selling everything i can't bring to the dorm but i always decide not to because almost everything reminds me of mama. And i'll hold on to them as long as i could.

I'm looking forward to the sem break. Yeah, right. Where i'll face the reality of a mature life. I don't even wanna go to La Union, but i need to. My sis and i need the moolah from these government agencies. I hope i don't worsen the stress i'm already feeling. And yeah, i gotta face the lawyers. 'Uhm, hi, im a law student, can i help you?' Ugh.

And my precious laptop has a vertical line of dead or maybe stuck pixels! I hope it doesn't worsen. An LCD replacement costs at least 9500. I blame myself for resting my feet (by mistake naman, akala ko yung mesa) on it occasionally.

And i hate the thought of travelling by bus alone. And passing by EDSA where i'll see Kabayan Hotel (where i would probably be just right now had Mr. X not fired a gun at an innocent person). Or the Luisita Mall, where mama and i stop for dinner or coffee. Or Carmen, where she'll take a CR break.

I wanna go to Apayao too and eat fresh steamed crabs and relax a bit. But i hate to travel alone too, unless i'd be able to ride with Homer's Uncle.

And i hate the thought of November 1, when i'll go to this small rectangular gazeebo of bougainvilleas towering over the place where both of my parents were buried. If mama were alive, she'd be one of the last people to leave the cemetery, to remember papa.

Now, its our turn.

I hate pain and i hate the longing.

But i know, i'll get by. I will get by.

I wonder when i'll ever finish a blog post on a happy note. I thought i started cheerfully already.

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