June 07, 2006

Happy days are over

I can feel it.

Summer vacation will come to an end in about a day or two. I'll be in QC by my lonesome in no time.

I said goodbye to Rhys, my five year old nephew, who left for my lolo's house since nobody will take care of him here. After kissing and hugging me tight i told him i'm going to Manila soon. He asked me why and i said i have to attend school there. "Rianne, you call me when you have a problem okay. But not in my cellphone, just call me in Caba."

I've been enjoying since April 11 and the fact that i have to face the grim situation of being alone again in a gloomy room where all i can see is a stockpile of readings scares the hell out of me.

Yes Rhys. Right now i have a problem and i'd prefer it if you stay here and play or watch DVDs with me. However, i want to get used to it. I want to start it, eating alone, sleeping alone, reading alone. Not that i'm alone all the time, but most of the time, i am. I need to because i have to concentrate and study.

Three more years and a half perhaps of self pity eating me alive because i'm lonely and homesick and crying. Worse, i am not even there yet.

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