October 29, 2004

Manila, Manila

Manila here i come!


Who knows how long i haven't set foot in this place. I haven't just got the time! I am working and i was studying and i had all sorts of appointments.


Tomorrow, i hope i catch a nice comfy Partas bus to QC and hopefully i can go home the same day. Please Lord. I hope by Saturday night, all people going back to the North have already gone ahead. Pleeeeeaase.



I have November 1 to spend of course at my Dad's tomb in Caba, La Union. I really don't have to go to the burial place to remember him but well heck, it's a tradition and it's also a nice way to catch up on other people i've not seen for a looooong time. Haha! Kidding but half meant!


Do you think our dead relatives still watch over us, wherever they may be right now?


Well, it's been how many years since he died, but i still remember him, A LOT. I still cry to say the least. I hope he's really happy now. I know he's happy...

October 24, 2004

Flowers in the backyard

I've been meaning to upload these photos but i've had no time to do so.


Anyway, i actually don't like our house. We just transferred there after college and i don't know i just hate the ambiance or whatever it is. Furthermore, we can't do anything like renovate or redesign it because the title is not yet in our possession as we haven't paid it in full. Thus, nothing will ever happen unless the owner and my mom come to terms about the price because the owner with all the weird and not so pleasant things about the house is asking too high a price for a house of that kind.


However, one sunny Sunday i just went around it and saw really nice things everywhere. It's really nice how you realize that such little simple things are actually so beautiful and you'll never notice until you stop and look at them for more than a minute or so. This is also true with our friends and loved ones. Sometimes, we always take for granted the simple things that they do to us. We only realize how good they've been in their own little ways when we stop and think about how much they care for us.





October 20, 2004

Uneventful

Several things i want to blog about:


1. Yay, i sold some stuff. I like it when i become entrepreneurial or something. I brought goodies from my sis' now defunct store to the office and i sold quite a few items. Hehe. I know its a small amount of money and it's not even mine, but i like it when i earn money like that. Oh well, i hope in the future, i'd get to do more of such stuff.


2. When you become friends with someone, quite a few times, the person really becomes close to you and then you grow to really love him or her. You give everything for the friendship to work and you don't spare a thing. However, sometimes you see it's becoming unfair and what you get from the relationship does not amount to what you are giving to it. Well, it's wrong to expect something in return but of course, you can't help it because any relationship should be something about giving and taking. At times, you want the person to change but whatever you do and however you put so much effort, it just does not work. In the end, it is up to you to choose to accept how things are. Reality bites.


3. Two interesting jeepney rides for a picture with a red background


The past two days, i've been leaving the office early because of my need for one piece of a one inch by one inch picture with a red background - silly, huh.


Anyway, i could have had this early on but it was a disaster at Colorado, Bauang. Last week, i went there during lunch and had my picture taken. However, i had a memory lapse and i just forgot to tell the photographer that the background should be red. I have all sorts of ID pictures but hey, none of them had a red background. Red is weird. So i went back there during afternoon break and had another shot taken. After five, i was ready to look at my ID picture with the red background, but no. It was not ready. I need it reshot, again. The reason was that they forgot to rewind the film, duh, whatever. I'd have to sit down on this silly stool again in front of these two guys and i was not gonna take anymore of that. Thus, i refunded.


So, to San Fernando I'd have to go.


Monday, i rode a jeepney and sat beside the driver. You know what a jeepney looks like, i assume. Behind me were some high school students from La Union High. They were dead drunk. Some were smoking. And there was a couple who were doing an ostentatious (as ate Marjo puts it) public display of affection. Man, the guy was kissing the girl's nape! These were fourth year high school students! Poor parents you have, little kids. Alright, this PDA guy was all over his girl friend and lo, had icing on his fingers, cake icing that is. I just realized some of it got to my nice hair (haha!). The real Rianne would have faced the guy and demanded an apology or shot a really evil look at the guy but i just removed the icing silently without looking because i was afraid of em. They were drunk. I don't know, but it seemed they were even laughing at me while i was removing it. Talk about repressed anger.


So the route was the 'San Fernando' route, which goes right towards Poro Point at the monument. Near POEA, some of these students went down. The guy directly behind the driver asked for change. I'll call him yellow smoking guy.


yellow smoking guy: Manong sukli mi.
driver: Di kay pay la nagbayad. Mano kayo.
yellow smoking guy: Innem manong. Ni, madi a manong. Bayad mi tattay sangagasot.
driver: Ni, maymaysa't sangagasot ittoy.
woman in spaghetti straps: Wen, bagi mi data. Duwa naggapu Bauang.
yellow smoking guy: Haan manong, nalutong diay bayad mi.
driver: Haan a. Uray kitaem (holding a coke tin can), awan pay naawat ko.
yellow smoking guy: Madi a manong. Adda pay sukli mi. (tugs at the driver and we almost hit a tricycle)
driver: Ni tarantadot tuyen. (pulling the jeep aside)
yellow smoking guy: Manot plete aya manong.
PDA icing guy: Baamon. Siak bahala.
yellow smoking guy: Awan kwartakon.
driver: Otso maysa.
yellow smoking guy: Madi a manong. Adda pay sukli mi. Parehas a manong. Siyete ti estudyante. Sukli mi.
driver: Tarantado ka. Nabarbartek kayo. Agdamag kat sukli di ka pay nagbayad. (drives again. The yellow smoking guy tugs at him and we have several near hits.)
driver: Tarantadot toyen. Aguray ta agmanmaneho ak. Ukinnayo, ipan kay diay outpost a.
PDA icing guy: (to his girlfriend, who seems to be irritated at the PDA but does not complain anyway!) Basta kita tayo mamya sa high school a. Hatid na lang kita.
PDA feeling innocent girl: Wen promise. Haanen, siak laengen. Umayak to idiay.
driver: Tarantado, ipan kay diay a. Naglugan kay diay Family Beach. Di kayo pay nagplete.


So the jeepney goes straight to the outpost. Many wanted to get down somewhere else but the driver just requested that the kids be first sent to the outpost. When we got there, I got out instantly without looking back lest i get involved and i didn't want to and ran to the photo studio only to find out i can't wait for the picture anymore and need to go back the next day for it. It was 20 bucks cheaper than Colorado Bauang's anyway. This was Konica at Yabes.


The moral of the long story: I am shocked at how these students were behaving - alcohol, smoking, PDA, cheating. It was a Monday afternoon, the first day of the week. They surely cut afternoon classes at the least. I look back and think that back in fourth year high school, my only preoccupation was Mariah Carey and my crush. Well i guess, times change. I keep hearing it being said that kids now are a different breed. However, this change in breed i hope is not one of a deteriorating kind. I'm just depressed and feel bad for their parents. Sigh, reality really bites.


The next jeepney ride was quite tame. I just sat next to a perhaps crazy guy in his late twenties. During the whole trip, i was at the edge of my seat afraid that he might just bite me or something. And the more i inched away, the more he got close to me. So i just let it be. But all's been good, he was very silent. He was just desperately fixing his really curly, frizzy and dirty hair. I even like his attitude. He was smiling. And some bratty little kids next to me were laughing at him. (These kids i couldve blasted had the good crazy guy become mad and attacked me).


Sometimes, crazy people actually make sense as long as you treat them normally. It's just bad that, they're crazy na nga and some people laugh at them pa. I even feel guilty for feeling afraid, but well that's life and reality bites.

October 16, 2004

Some interesting emails

God's Blessings


A young man was getting ready to graduate from college. For many months he had admired a beautiful sports car in a dealer's showroom, and knowing his father could well afford it, he told him that was all he wanted.


As Graduation Day approached, the young man awaited signs that his father had purchased the car. Finally, on the morning of his graduation his father called him into his private study. His father told him how proud he was to have such a fine son, and told him how much he loved him. He handed his son a beautifully wrapped gift box. Curious, but somewhat disappointed the young man opened the box and found a lovely, leather-bound Bible. Angrily, he raised his voice at his father and said, "With all your money, you give me a Bible?" and stormed out of the house, leaving the holy book.


Many years passed and the young man was very successful in business. He had a beautiful home and wonderful family, but realized his father was very old, and thought perhaps he should go to him. He had not seen him since that graduation day.


Before he could make arrangements, he received a telegram telling him his father had passed away, and willed all of his possessions to his son. He needed to come home immediately and take care of things. When he arrived at his father's house, sudden sadness and regret filled his heart. He began to search his father's important papers and saw the still new Bible, just as he had left it years ago. With tears, he opened the Bible, and began to turn the pages. As he read those words, a car key dropped from an envelope taped behind the Bible. It had a tag with the dealer's name, the same dealer who had the sports car he had desired. On the tag was the date of his graduation, and the words ... PAID IN FULL. How many times do we miss God's blessings because they are not packaged as we expected? If this touched your heart repost...




Ten Ways to Marry the Wrong Person By Dov Heller


With the divorce rate over 50%, too many are apparently making a serious mistake in deciding whom to spend the rest of their life with. To avoid becoming a "statistic," try to internalize 10 insights.


1. You pick the wrong person because you expect him/her to change after you're married. The classic mistake! NEVER MARRY POTENTIAL!! The Golden Rule is, if you can't be happy with the person the way he or she is now, don't get married. As a colleague of mine so wisely put it, "You actually can expect people to change after their married...for the worst!" So when it comes to the other person's spirituality, character, personal hygiene, communication skills, and personal habits, make sure you can live with these as they are now. It's as good as it gets!


2. You pick the wrong person because you focus more on chemistry than their character. Chemistry ignites the fire, but good character keeps it burning. Beware of the "I'm in love" syndrome. "I'm in love" often means, "I'm in lust." Attraction is there, but have you carefully checked out this person's character? Here are four characteristics to definitely check for:
* Humility: Does this person believe that "doing the right thing" is more important than personal comfort?
* Kindness: Does this person enjoy giving pleasure to other people? How does s/he treat people s/he doesn't have to be nice to? Does s/he do volunteer work? Give to charity?
* Responsibility: Can I depend on this person to do what s/he says s/he's going to do?
* Happiness: Does this person like himself? Does s/he enjoy life? s/he emotionally stable? Ask yourself: Do I want to be more like this person? Do I want to have a child with this person? Would I like my child to turn out like him or her?


3. You choose the wrong person because you do not share a common life, goal and priorities. There are three basic ways we connect with another person:
(1) Chemistry and compatibility,
(2) Share common interests and
(3)Share a life goal.
Make sure you share a deeper level of connection that sharing life goals provide.
After marriage, the two of you will either grow together or grow apart.
To avoid growing apart, you must figure out what you're living for while you are single-and then find someone who has come to the same conclusion as you. This is the true definition of a soul mate. A soul mate is a goal mate... two people who ultimately share the same understanding of life's purpose and therefore share the same priorities, values and goals.


4. You pick the wrong person because you do not have deeper emotional connection. To evaluate whether you have a deeper emotional connection or not, ask: "Do I respect and admire this person?" This does not mean, "Am I impressed by this person?" We are impressed by a Mercedes. We do not respect someone because they own a Mercedes. Yes, you should be impressed by qualities of creativity, loyalty, determination, etc., but do you actually respect and admire this person who possesses these qualities? Also ask: "Do I trust this person?" This also means, "Is he/she emotionally stable? Do I feel I can rely on him/her?


5. You pick the wrong person because you choose someone with whom you don't feel emotionally safe. Ask yourself the following questions: Do I feel calm, peaceful and relaxed with this person? Can I fully be myself, and express myself with this person? Does this person make me feel good about myself? Do you have a really close friend who makes you feel this way? Make sure the person you marry makes you feel the same way! (That's why best friends usually fall under this category perfectly! But that's another story...) Are you afraid of this person in any way? You should not feel you need to monitor what you say because you are afraid of how the other person will view it. If you're afraid to express your feelings and opinions openly, there's a problem with the relationship. Another aspect of feeling safe is that you don't feel the other person is trying to control you. Controlling behaviors are a sign of an abusive person. Be on the lookout out for someone who is always trying to change you. There is a big difference between "controlling" and "making suggestions." A suggestion is made for your benefit; a control statement is made for their benefit.


6. You pick the wrong person because you don't put everything on the table. Anything that bothers you about the relationship must be brought up for discussion. Bringing up the uncomfortable stuff is the only way to evaluate how well the two of you communicate, negotiate, and work together. Over the course of a lifetime, difficulties will inevitably arise. You need to know now, before making a commitment: Can you resolve your differences and find compromises that work for both of you? Never be afraid to let the person know what bothers you. This is also a way for you to test how vulnerable you can be with this person. If you can't be vulnerable, you can't be intimate. The two go hand in hand.


7. You pick the wrong person because you use the relationship to escape from personal problems and unhappiness. If you are unhappy and single, you'll probably be unhappy and married, too. Marriage does not fix personal, psychological and emotional problems. If anything, marriage will exacerbate them. If you are not happy with yourself and your life, take responsibility to fix it now while you are single. You'll feel better and your future spouse will thank you.


8. You choose the wrong person because you get involved sexually too quickly. This can be a big problem because it often precludes a fully honest exploration of important issues. Sexual involvement tends to cloud one's mind. And a clouded mind is not inclined to make good decisions. It is not necessary to "test drive" in order to find out if a couple are sexually compatible. If you do your homework and make sure you are intellectually and emotionally compatible, you don't have to worry about sexual compatibility. Of all the studies on divorce, sexual incompatibility is never cited as a main reason why people divorce.


9. You pick the wrong person because the man doesn't understand what a woman needs most. Men and women have unique emotional needs (Men are from Mars...Women are from Venus!) and more often than not, it is the man who just doesn't get it. The unique need of a woman is to be loved, to feel that she is the most important person in her husband's life. The husband needs to give her consistent, quality attention. Sexual intimacy is always on the woman's terms. Men are goal oriented especially when it comes to this area. As a wise woman once pointed out, "Men have two speeds: on and off." Women are experience oriented. When a man is able to switch gears and become more experience-oriented, he will discover what makes his wife very happy. When the man forgets about his own needs and focuses on giving his wife pleasure, amazing things will happen.


10. You pick the wrong person because he/she is involved in a triangle. To be "triangulated" means a person is emotionally dependent on someone or something else while trying to develop a relationship. But of course, being "triangulated" with God is the best triangulation you could have with your partner! A person who hasn't separated from his or her parents is a classic example of triangulation. People can also be triangulated with things as well, such as work, drugs, Internet, hobbies, sports or money. Be careful that you and your partner are free of triangles. The person caught in a triangle cannot be fully emotionally available to you. You'll not be their number one priority. And that's not basis for a marriage. Ability is what you're capable of doing.

October 13, 2004

Time is gold

TV is taking too much of my time and maybe your time too. We spend like what -- three or four hours glued in front of the television watching soap operas and horrendous news items.


It is not really bad per se but look at how much time we spend watching TV shows or movies compared to the time we spend talking with our loved ones, friends or spending time improving ourselves.


Lately, i've been sleeping early. I don't know, maybe i'm just plain tired but it's been doing good to me. I've lost touch with one of my first loves which is reading. Lately, i've been reading more and i feel better. You see, the mind is stimulated more when reading rather than looking at something. If you watch it on screen, you don't have to visualize it and use your imagination. However, if you read it, your mind is exercised and you are forced to see things, maybe differently from what the author is saying. Ideas come out and you philosophize and rethink concepts you've had in the past.


Do you know that in a year you can cover all chapters of the Bible, if only you spend fifteen minutes each day to read it? Fifteen minutes is nothing compared to the whole time we spend doing other less sensible things.


At my age, i've been really thinking about my life and my options and what have you. Time flies so fast and i've wasted a lot of it. Yes, we need some amount of relaxation, of course. However, technology and all these improvements offer so many benefits but also make other significant things deteriorate.


There's the email but there's nothing like a handwritten and neatly folded letter. There are neat video games but there's nothing like a good game of hide and seek with your neighborhood friends. Sometimes, we think a lot about earning lots of money and giving a comfortable life for our families at the expense of spending time with them, which they need more than comfort i think.


It is actually hard to balance everything but maybe we ought to spend time thinking about what really means more to us and make decisions based on our priorities.

October 09, 2004

I LOST MY PHONE!

Yes, i lost my phone.


No more 'Rianne: phone addict'. No more 'Rianne's high phone bills'. No more 'Rianne texting fast'. No more 'Rianne's one hour calls'. No more 'Rianne's fighting someone on the phone'. No more PHONE. No more 7250.


I so hate the person who stole my phone. It was just inside my pocket or my bag. It got lost on my way from UP to SM. I was sitting inside Dencio's grill and checked for text messages but it's gone. I wanted to cry and i cried. Not really cry, but shed tears because i was so mad!


Now, i have to learn how not to have a cellphone for a while.


Yes, i lost my phone. Did it sink in yet? Rianne lost the freaking phone. Someone stole the freaking phone.


Bad day. The start of sem break. The last day of school. The last exam in school. The last day of my love affair with my phone. So sad. I just put a really nice wallpaper in it this morning - Padre's Globe ad. So sad. So sad.


Rianne lost her phone. Rianne lost her phone for the first time.

October 04, 2004

Tanong ko lang...

Hawig ba kami?







just asking...

October 03, 2004

Sigh...

Don't you sometimes do things because of a good reason then it gets out of hand? It appears you made the biggest mistake of your life and you seem to be the most evil and stupid person in the world. Your intentions are different but they are judged otherwise.


How you're told about your mistake counts a lot. Sometimes you want it told straight. Sometimes you want them to beat around the bush. Sometimes you want it said in private. Sometimes you want everyone to know about it. You expect something and if you don't get it you are offended and hurt. However, you still must apologize and thank any one who tells you you've done something wrong.


The worst thing though is if you find about it in another way like finding out about it from another person. One thing that really pisses me off is when i find out that one person is so nice to you when you're around but keeps saying negative things when you are not listening in. Tsk. Tsk. I hate hypocrisy.


Let it pass. Let it pass. I know we all have our dose of this. Di ba?